{ten}

My oldest child turned 10 on Friday. Creepy, huh? The thing is, I totally remember my tenth birthday. I remember my party, that I got the soundtrack from the "Muppet Movie", and that my friends didn't all get along with each other. And now I have a child with 10 years behind him. 10 years of memories and experiences and hurts and triumphs. I've been a parent for 10 years. 10 years of worries and joys and frustrations and laughter. I had no idea how much my life would change with this one, much wanted, loving little boy. There have been struggles as I've had to, over and over, die to myself and suppress my selfish nature. There have been moments of take-your-breath-away realizations that this little person has been entrusted to us. I think the point of it all, in the beginning, was to teach him all he needed to know to live a life of significance. What I didn't know was just how much I would learn from having him around. I'm so very proud to be his mom.

This baby that I gave birth to 10 years ago is going to football camp as his gift from us. Thankfully it is just a day camp that runs at the nearby university. He is completely thrilled with this opportunity. It's taken a while for me to wrap my mind around allowing him to play a sport with so much contact and the potential of pain.

The journalling on this layout reads: June 22, 2007 Noah, you woke up this morning and you're 10! You'll have lots of choices, opportunities, and decisions in this stage of your life. Daddy and I are here for you to talk, to help, and to cheer you on. XO Mommy

Thanks for looking, this was a fun one to work on!

Lilies of the flowerbed

When I was a child my mother spent hours out in the yard working on her flowerbeds. Every spring she would (and still does!) take me on a tour of her plants. I remember boring hours spent looking at annuals in greenhouses. I understand it now. I love peeking my head out the front door every morning to see if the perennials are growing in the early spring or if a bud opens as the plants mature. I breathe deeper in a greenhouse. I still have a lot to learn. It amazes me that God could think up so many colours and beautiful types of growing plants for our enjoyment. Butterflies, ladybugs, and other crawlies keep my children close to the blossoms. I get a small jolt of pleasure each time I pull out a weed and great satisfaction in digging in the dirt.

Enjoy these pics of our lilies, taken in this morning's sunshine. The bulbs were a Mother's Day gift from my husband and children several years ago.

{The Bride}

As a little girl, I wasn't captivated by princesses and fairies and make-believe prettiness. I guess I've always been a cynic at heart. I suppose I went through a phase where I imagined my Prince Charming but he was more likely to be at a coffee shop than a castle and wearing chinos than armor. I know, not very imaginative or fantastic.

Enter my three daughters. Much to my chagrin they've bought this whole Disney princess thing hook, line, and sinker. They pretend to be mermaids or French girls with hunchbacked friends. They sing songs that start like, "I love being a Princess." Especially my youngest. She even sighs. I roll my eyes. This isn't what I want them to think beauty is about.

We spent this past weekend at a family wedding. Georgia commented to me at one point, "I didn't know there was going to be a bride!" The back table was, jokingly, I presume, decorated with a bride and groom Barbie in full princess garb. I roll my eyes. My daughter collects all the clear heart confetti she can find to make the Barbie princess even more shiny. She is captivated. I am not. Until the magical moment. Georgia asks the bride, my cousin's new wife, to dance. She says yes. She engages this child and connects with her in the most beautiful way. I am humbled by her sweetness and loveliness as she bends down to talk to this 4-year-old little girl. It's like they are the only two people in the room, on the dance floor. I stop rolling my eyes. I guess you really can have the whole package.

While I know better and the cynic in me doesn't even think I should type this, I wish them a happily ever after.

Tea Party Girls

It was a weekend of "functions." The girls were invited to a tea party on Saturday afternoon, hosted by two young women from our church. These are not ordinary young women. They are the kind you hope your girls will turn out to be and the kind you hope your sons will marry. Sweet, generous, and thoughtful, they usually have a following of little girl admirers in between services on a Sunday morning. Several young girls were invited and the party was rounded out with women from different stages of life: some mothers, some singles, some grandmothers, young and old. The backyard where the tea took place looked like something out of a magazine with tables set with white linens and fresh flowers, shaded with lovely mature trees. The girls could hardly wait for the day to arrive and did not look back when I delivered them for their 2-hour party. What an investment these young women chose to make and what an impression it left on my girls. Sophie was concerned about how to sit, Georgia was counting the sleeps, and Olivia was excited to report that they won a garden decoration for having the most girls from one family. Good times.

I was too weary to post on Friday afternoon but I should have. There are such contrasts in the life of a mom and Friday really showed proof of this to me. My children are well-behaved, generally speaking. Friday afternoon we went out for our usual library date; the little girls go to a story time and the rest of us browse and read. Following that we headed to the grocery store and they were like aliens! My youngest wanted to be carried, my oldest was a pest, and the two in between asked for every other thing you could think of. I shop with them weekly, they know the drill. It was one of those humbling trips that I'm glad to leave behind. We'll do better next time.

Sunday evening was another fun event: the high school graduation tea for the four youth at our church who will finish Grade 12 this month. This is a big deal where the girls wear their formal dresses, walk out under an arbour, and each set of parents writes a tribute that is read at this time. It was really wonderful to celebrate (not to mention the decadent chocolate dessert that was served). At the end of the evening I had a chance to speak to my oldest daughter's Sunday School teacher. She's just a wonderful lady and we're so pleased with the quality of her teaching. She shared an amazing answer that Olivia gave to a question she asked. The question: "Why does God not always give us what we pray for?" The answer from my 7-year-old: "Maybe He knows that if He gave us that thing, we would love it more than we love Him and that wouldn't be good for us." And a little child will lead them...

We are on summer vacation! I'm hoping to have a little more time to post here. Enjoy your day!

Within reach

The end of the school year is so close I can taste it! The kids and I just finished our work for today and it looks like we will be able to wrap up for the year on Friday. I am so excited as this is the first year that I feel a real finality to the work we've done, we're not just finishing because the calendar says we're done. I must credit these kids of mine for their hard work this year. I pushed them pretty hard and they are going to reap the rewards with a nice long summer break. Exciting stuff!

I am looking forward to a few things clearing off my schedule as well. Tonight is my last night of guitar lessons, our bible study group is on hiatus until the fall, and the few activities we do have left will be more manageable in light of these things falling off our lists. I am not sure if I yet know just what my capacity is in terms of scheduling. I do know that this year was more balanced than last year but I'm not sure if I can pinpoint exactly why. It seems to be a decision-by-decision thing and is much more complex than just what I have on my plate. Everyone in this household contributes to the balance of our home. I need to balance out my husband when he is feeling overwhelmed and I rely on him to do the same. When neither of us has any capacity for this, that's when we're in big trouble.

This layout I'm sharing today comes out of a neat encounter we had last fall at a big agricultural exhibition in town. This lady was so sweet in describing how she spins wool after the sheep are sheared and the girls were so attentive to her explanation. Cool moments like these make me very thankful that we are homeschooling!

More later.

My life as a musician

Some of you know that I trained as a classical guitarist and now teach lessons out of my home a few hours every week. While I fell in love with classical guitar music, I did not initially intend to play the guitar. I wanted a piano so badly. I told my parents that I wanted to take piano lessons and my mother said, "But we don't have a piano." "Okay, I'll take guitar then." The teacher that I studied with during my years living at home interviewed his students before he agreed to enroll them in his studio. He said years later that my answer to his question of why I wanted to study the classical guitar (which was, candidly, "because my parents can't afford a piano!") was one of the reasons he agreed to teach me. We had a wonderful rapport and I owe, in large part, my devotion to this art to him.

I graduated from high school, moved to Edmonton, and then I had my chance to study piano! I spent hours in the tiny practice rooms off the music department. A frustrating experience, to some extent, as I thought my music background would translate into quick success. I all but abandoned my guitar during this time (except for a couple of bass accompaniment opportunities for the concert choir I sang in), focusing on the piano and enjoying my lessons. At the end of two years of study in Alberta I turned down a significant academic scholarship to return to Saskatchewan to study music. I felt like an impostor but I so wanted to and probably should have gone to that straight after high school.

My audition on guitar took hours and hours of preparation and I failed the theory exam disastrously. I was placed at the lowest level of entry for theory and struggled with those classes through my next 4 years of study. I got a very part-time job teaching music in a studio and I discovered that I have a real gift in teaching (fortunately you don't have to understand every in and out of the mechanics of music or I'd be sunk!). I studied piano as my minor instrument under a very accomplished pianist and had exposure to amazing performances and discussions. I became the first woman to graduate with a classical guitar major from the music faculty.

I didn't develop into a great pianist. I passed a piano proficiency test needed to complete the requirements of my degree but I'm not going to stun anyone with my piano performance. I've since had a classical guitar built for me by a wonderful craftsman and I continue to love to teach. This childhood dream, however, was fulfilled about 7 years ago when my inlaws moved from their farm into the nearby town. They had told Gary and I that we could have the piano as soon as we had room for it. My husband is classically trained and even competed at the provincial level. My oldest daughter is finishing up her second year of piano studies and has shown wonderful promise as a musician. It has become her thing. My second-oldest daughter recently started violin lessons. My son is learning to play the guitar and my youngest daughter is interested in pursuing voice lessons (or piano, or cello, or violin...it changes regularly).

Receiving this beautiful antique piano with lovely tone and a rich history is just proof to me that God cares about the desires of our hearts. The reality of having this instrument in our home speaks to the 9-year old in me and resonates the truth through my whole being that I am taken care of...not just my needs, but some of those wants too. I am so thankful.

Now Settle Down...

I know. What is this craziness? Two blog entries in one week? Settle down! I told you I have things to share and I want to make sure I don't forget to do that. I also have a little request to make...

I'm currently working on a class concept and what I need from any and all of you is some direction. I am wanting to be directed to websites, books, articles, etc. that deal with spiritual issues. Not necessarily Christianity (although this is research for a Sunday School class I'll be teaching next year sometime), anything current and spiritual will do. I am particularly interested in the bestseller/high profile stuff. To get the obvious out of the way, yes, I have already read The Da Vinci Code. It is along those lines that I'm looking though as well as contemporary Christian stuff. Don't worry about analyzing anything for me, I just want to be pointed in the direction of stuff that people might be talking about or that you've seen in the media regarding spirituality and/or Christianity. I would be very thrilled with some suggestions.

Busy busy these days...soccer, swimming, piano, violin, art classes, music teaching, oh...did someone need clean underwear? Can't you just look in your sister's drawer or something? Okay, so we're not quite that desperate yet, but I do find this increase in outside activity to be taking a toll on my impeccable housekeeping. Okay, so my housekeeping is not impeccable. I've been getting my bed made and some semblance of a meal on the table. As far as anything Martha-esque, this is truly not the season to be looking for that.

I don't know what your schedule is like and I know that everyone has a different capacity for stuff like this. I just find that our home "feels" different when we're not in it very often. I'm not sure that I like this pace and I am glad that we've (mostly) chosen to keep things to a manageable level as far as outside activities are concerned. I love reading Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 for the clear picture those chapters give on the activities a godly woman engages herself in. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't interpret either of those to say that a woman should never leave the house or anything like that. They do, however, speak to a care for home and family that are difficult to exercise when you're not at home or with your family for a good amount of the time. Just some ramblings to give you a glimpse into what I'm thinking about as I drive from place to place...

Here is my latest scrapbooking layout. My youngest daughter is a true snuggler (as you may have surmised from my previous post) and she will come up to me at any point in the day and kiss whatever body part is most accessible: knees, elbows, neck, you name it! Not all of my children are this naturally affectionate and I am so thankful for her demonstrations of love. Hope you get a kick out of this: